“Telling me to relax or smile when I’m angry is like bringing a birthday cake into an ape sanctuary. You’re just asking to get your nose and genitals bitten off.”
~ Amy Poehler
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Daily Culinary Quote: Planning ahead
“Pre-heat the oven? Really? If I was the sort of person who planned ahead, I wouldn’t be eating this Totino’s Party Pizza in the first place.”
~ Adam Peterson
Daily Culinary Quote: Cookies and obsolete gender roles
“I’m thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies.”
~ Norm MacDonald
Anonymous:
You baked cookies? Dude no offense but that’s kind of gay.
jaydenw:
I take it you mean gay as in feminine. If so then you’re way off, baking is manly as hell. I saw where cookies weren’t and say no, this will not do. I created my own food, with science. I wanted cookies, so I made some goddamn cookies because they are tasty and delicious. The only difference between me and my mother making them, is I took some grown up initiative instead of being caught up in obsolete gender roles.
The only thing that would have been gay about me baking cookies is if a dude wanted to perform fellatio on me as payment for them because lets face it, my cookies are fucking goddamn delicious.
~ Jayden (@jaydenw) Ask Jayen a Question
Daily Culinary Quote: Because this is America
“Why would you put bacon on nachos in the first place?” Misha asked.
“Dude. We’re in America. We put bacon on everything.”
~ Avon Gale (Power Play)
“Being American is to eat a lot of beef steak, and boy, we’ve got a lot more beef steak than any other country, and that’s why you ought to be glad you’re an American.”
~ Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. (Interview in City Limits, 11 March 1983)
“Aw, no. You’re taking us to that vegetarian place, aren’t you?”
“It’s a coffee place. You can’t just automatically classify anything that isn’t a steak house as vegetarian.”
“Yes, I can. This is America. You said Americans assert their own opinions as if they were facts and dismiss inconvenient facts as mere opinions.”
~ Kevin Hearne (Kaibab Unbound)
Daily Culinary Quote: Why civic engagement remains important
“I think our former first lady said it last month in one of her first speeches since leaving the White House, I think I’m getting the quote nearly right- “Who could possibly be against feeding children wholesome, good food?” Well, it turns out there are people who are against feeding children wholesome good food and there are people who are against solving our homelessness problem, they’re against solving our food security issues and by and along political lines.”
~ Andrew Zimmern (BYT interview with Andrew Zimmern)